SOME GUY NAMED "ZACH" WINS PIG MADNESS V!!
by: Michael "Elvis" Greene August 2nd, 2009
Los Angeles, California -- The sun rose over the eastern horizon much like it does
every morning but something in the air made this day different. Something in the
air said that this day would be like no other before it. Today was, in fact, the day
of a National Pass The Pigs League (NPPL) event...an event that would solidify the
league's place in the official history of the game of Pass the Pigs.
Pig Madness V was once again held in Venice Beach California on Saturday,
August 1, 2009 marking it's fifth anniversary of continued success. There's been
quite a bit of game-play and controversy over the years but one thing that this
Madness proved is that this event, and this league, are here to stay with a record
shattering 42 contestants and approximately 12 onlookers, 10 volunteers, and one
very special guest and more.
Perry Day led the opening remarks as he explained the game to the new players,
discussed the rules, and introduced some very special guests. Also In attendance
was Michael "Elvis" Greene who is often credited for founding the NPPL in 1998.
Greene flew in from New Jersey and participated in his very first Madness event ever.
Also in attendance was Jeff Schwartz, who had been previously suspended from the
game, although he apparently had no idea about that what-so-ever. Jeff stepped up to
the microphone and made a public apology although, honestly, he still had no idea
why. "I don't know what I did but I feel I've paid the price. I'm back." he said to
thunderous applause. With that apology he was quickly welcomed back into the world
of Pigs with open arms.
Once the pleasantries and introductions were over, at approximately 2:15pm on Saturday, the pigs hit the tables and all hell broke loose...but in a good way. With five tables in play and four opponents per table, the spectacle quickly turned into a frenzy of pig passing and party insanity. Two kegs made their way to the party early (with ice but no buckets...thanks Johnny...buckets arrived later...thanks again Johnny) and food was provided by Chef E, which marks the Chef's second time as the official caterer of Pig Madness.
The 42 contestants were divided into 3 divisions. Hog, Swine, and Boar. Each division contained 14 contestants who were given a colored sheet to mark their bracket. The idea was simple: Play everyone in your bracket once and write down the score. The top players in each bracket would move on to the next round. This plan worked incredibly well thanks to the preparation by John Coscia, Mark Rago, and Perry Day. The League's organizational skills have greatly improved over the years, that's for sure.
There were several moments of interest during the day, but perhaps the
most interesting of the two was the amazing Double Leaning Jowler roll by John
Coscia which was approved, and validated, by David Moffat himself. But, as
with all double jowlers, there is controversy. One pig landed on a notebook
and one landed on the table. Some called that "bad pigs" and wanted a re-roll,
while others said it still counted as being in play. Either way, when you
have the inventor of your game calling the roll, his decision stands. John will
be added to the record books as the 4th Double Leaning Jowler roller in NPPL play.
The second interesting event happened mere seconds before Coscia's historic
roll. It was an apparent Oinker rolled by Mark Rago that required a ruling by none
other than David Moffat himself. Were these pigs touching? The video footage
shows Moffat using an interesting utensil to investigate the pigs. (see the photo insert).
Moffat ruled the pigs were, in fact, NOT touching and game play continued. Gary Williams was so amazed by the unique device that Moffat produced that he couldn't help but ask, "What is that? What do you call that thing?" To which a steady Moffat replied, "A toothpick."
The day continued as players were systematically eliminated from the game. Kelvin Wilburn, Phil Harvey, and Zach Kuperman had impressive records and were moved directly to the quarterfinals. The Final 8 players were Phil Harvey vs Sheree Pouls; Adam Meyer vs. Pierre Dominguez, Zach Kuperman vs. Elvis Greene, and Bill Vergos vs. Kelvin Wilburn. The games were incredible and included some of the days most exciting game play moments, but in the end, Phil, Adam, Zach and Kelvin would be the final four.
Several people thought Adam Meyer would take the victory for sure as he was the 2007 Pig Madness Champion, but that was not to be as Phil shut him down and secured his place in the final round. Kelvin lost to Zach in a clean sweep, which sent Zach to face Phil in the Champions Final Round. Sadly, Phil just couldn't handle Zach's offensive, and calculated, play and once again Zach swept his opponent and took home the gold and the glory.
Zach Kuperman will go down in the record books as the Champion of Pig Madness V. ...but how did he do it? Dressed as a mild mannered Miller Lite delivery man, Zach made his very first appearance at any pig event. In fact, he didn't even know how to play the game when he woke up that morning. This "rookie" status and his mild mannered nature allowed him to fly under the radar until the quarterfinal rounds when he ripped open his proverbial shirt and showed off his fancy blue underwear. Kuperman (rhymes with Superman) had arrived in the world of Pigs.
Since then, Kuperman has claimed he plans on reaching the status of a Tiger Woods or a Michael Jordan in the sport of professional pig passing. Only time will tell if he has what it takes or if he's simply setting himself up to look like a "beginners luck" kind of guy. In any case, the NPPL seems to have gained a serious pig passer that is planning on a long, and hopefully victorious, career.
Overall, the day was amazing and many hailed the event as the greatest Pig Madness event in the history of the sport. Many new friends were made and many amazing pigs were passed. But most of all, we all learned four very important lessons.
1) The National Pass The Pigs League is growing stronger every year and, with the validation of a celebrity visit from the inventor, appears to have no signs of slowing down.
2) Strangers can still meet up for a common stupid purpose, have a great time together, and leave with many new friends. The love of the pigs is binding to us all and is a great way to build lasting relationships.
3) We also learned that when you pick up the kegs and the ice, remember to get the friggin' buckets to put the ice and the kegs in.
4) And most important... as always, we learned that you've got to know when to Pass the Pigs.
Remember folks, it's a Pig Nation. Pass it on.
Pass the Pigs inventor David Moffat
Kuperman...a bad-ass Pigs passer, not a beer delivery guy!
Moffat checking if the Pigs are touching
Perry Day briefing the crowd
The Madness!!
NPPL Founder Elvis Greene and Pass the Pigs inventor David Moffat
The most impressive special guest of the day, however, had to be the one and only David Moffat who invented the game of Pass The Pigs. Moffat drove in from Bakersfield California after discovering the site some time ago and decided he wanted to have a few beers and laugh at/with us. Not only was his public appearance at the NPPL Pig Madness 5 event a very welcome visit from a fan's perspective, but it also solidified a place in history for the NPPL. Finally, after a decade of competitions, the league can claim a place on the world map and have validation to back it up. Essentially, the league has been recognized publicly by a public official. What more could you ask for? (ok, so maybe David didn't exactly hand us a certified plaque or anything, but he laughed with us and had a few beers...we think that counts.) And much to every one's surprise, and probably to their relief, although Moffat did attend he declined to enter the competition on the grounds that it could be seen as him having an unfair advantage. Instead, he just enjoyed the day. (But oh, imagine the controversy if he entered and won.)
